Discouragement *

AAAUUUGGHHH!!! Don't you hate it when you're blogging along, happily and on a roll.....AND THEN THE STINKIN' COMPUTER DOES SOMETHING STRANGE AND YOU LOOSE YOU POST???????

Anyway....Oh, I found it!!!! Ok, take 2!

Alas, the honeymoon phase of homeschooling has officially worn off. No, I'm not regretting my decision, nor the sheer number of smallish offspring that David and I have. But, sometimes, these two factors, combined with my almost-obsessive and domineering desire to "educate these kids!" lead me straight down a path that I don't like. It's hard to keep the momentum up. It's hard not to get stressed out. It's hard not to want to scream my head off and run away, as far and as fast as I can. It's hard not to completely submerge myself inn chocolate and shopping!!!

I called up David this morning, and said, "Ok, it's time for my daily pep talk...remind me why we're homeschooling again?" *sigh* It gets old, this feeling of being overwhelmed and exhausted. What to do, what to do.

Veterans know what I'm talking about. Nodding with the "uh huh, I've been there" look, you know that there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Newbies, take courage -- these feelings don't last forever. There are ups and downs, just like there are with every other aspect of life. Today is just one of the downer days.

It hit me hard this morning. Not because I feel like my boys are lacking. I think they are doing awesome, and are really loving what they're learning about. Nathan is learning about mechanical components this week, and just finished making a paper link chain. Yeah, it's an easy project, but he understands links & chains now. Zachary's weather study is nearing a close, and he constantly correcting me. "No, mom. It's troposphere not stratosphere." He learned about rainbows today and made a barometer. Both boys are really getting the most they can out of what they're learning.

But trying to keep them on task, and get things interesting for the littles is presenting an obstacle. Micah hasn't wanted anything but to be permanently attached to me all morning. Couple kids not getting along in one room. Another kid is being pitiful and milking his boo-boo for all its worth. Then, there's the going back and forth between the 2 big boys and making sure they understand what they are learning. Whew! It's a lot of back-n-forth, back-n-forth.

I'm learning, though. I don't own this lesson, as I'm still in the midst of it. There's a song that a friend of mine wrote called "Grace for Every Minute". That song has been ringing in my head. I have to keep telling myself that, no matter what, there's One who's sovereign over everything. Only He can give me the grace that I need. And until I learn to fully rely on Him, I will fail over and over again. He must supply everything I need, including grace for homeschooling.

You know, after writing all this, I feel much better. Tomorrow holds a new day and new set of adventures. But more importantly, it holds new opportunities to cry out to my Lord for everything I need! Yay!!